


Lobotomy

by JustAnotherMadOne



Series: Discord Drabbles [5]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Angst, Bad Ending, Based on a loose Concept, Fake AH Crew, Lobotomy, M/M, Mercy Killing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-17
Updated: 2017-12-17
Packaged: 2019-02-16 01:46:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13043955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustAnotherMadOne/pseuds/JustAnotherMadOne
Summary: (Based on a fanfic idea: FAHC!verse Ryan is captured and held prisoner in a mental institution, where the 'staff' try to brainwash and gaslight him into believing he's not the Vagabond, but a patient known only as John Doe. Consider this a bad ending possibility.)'As the hammer was brought up, Ryan kept up the same mantra in his mind, as if willing to stay strong and awake and himself.'





	1. Lobotomy

**Author's Note:**

> This was a plot idea I had:   
> 'FAHC!Verse with Ryan being kidnapped... but is shipped off to a psychiatric hospital (is it an actual one? Probably not, but he doesn't know that!) and is basically put on a course of brainwashing.  
> So, the 'doctors' tell him that he's not Ryan Haywood... he's a simple man they call John Doe who has severe delusions and they want to help. He fights back at first, but he starts to doubt it.  
> Meanwhile, the Fakes band together to rescue him... but are they going to have Ryan or 'John'?'
> 
> So, that idea spawned this 'Bad End' scenario. Oops. :P

Ryan watched the clock ticking, the only sound besides the footsteps of the doctors around him.

He couldn't move with the straps holding him down to the examination table and he knew that struggling would just make it worse for him in the long run. These doctors would just pin him down or drug him... and just continue what they were doing.

He knew the procedure and what was going to happen to him.

The head doctor walked into the Vagabond's view, smiling sympathetically. God, if his hands were free, Ryan would gladly have punched that damn smile off his stupid face.

"Now John, it's a very simple procedure." The doctor began in that condescending voice. "We've already administered and anaesthetic, so you won't feel a thing. Once the procedure is over, you'll be on the fast track to recovery."

"Fuck. You." Ryan hissed, raw fury in his eyes as he glared at the doctor. "And stop calling me that. That's not my name!"

The doctor tutted. "Oh my. Don't worry, the procedure will lower aggressive tendencies and that has always been an issue with you, hasn't it John?" He continued. "Now, if you could just relax and we will begin."

Another doctor appeared, wielding a small hammer and what looked like an ice pick. It was obvious what the next step was. "Get away from me...!" Ryan growled, feeling the straps tightening and stopping his struggling. "Don't you dare do this!"

They didn't listen.

The tip of the pick was brought closer to Ryan's eye.

"Everything will be alright, John. Just relax and we will be done before you know it."

Ryan wanted to scream at the doctors. Break free. Get away. He couldn't be here! He needed to be with his crew - his  _ family _ !

He hissed as the very tip of the pick slid into the corner of his eye.

It was already over.

As the hammer was brought up, Ryan kept up the same mantra in his mind, as if willing to stay strong and awake and  _ himself _ .

My Name is James Ryan Haywood

_ tap _

My Name is James Ryan Haywood

_ tap _

My Name is James Ryan Haywood

_ tap _

My name is Ryan Haywood

_ tap _

My name is Ryan Haywood   
_ tap _   
My name is Ryan   
_ tap _   
My name is Ryan   
_ tap _   
My name is...   
_ tap _   
My name...   
_ tap _   
Name...   
_ Tap _   
...

...   
...   
When the Fakes broke into the institute to rescue the Vagabond, all they found was 'John', sat in a wheelchair and staring blankly out of the window at the clouds.

When he saw them, he just smiled and went along with what they were saying... and he never spoke against it.

Months after and 'John' was still childlike, but he had slowly grown to like his new friends, especially 'Tim', 'Vav', and 'Mogar'. They still had to take care of him, but he didn't mind.

But the Fakes could only mourn as, even though rescued their friends, Ryan had died in that institute.


	2. Bonus: Mercy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So uh... if you haven't read or seen One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, you might want to skip this part.

Jeremy couldn't take it.

It had been months since they rescued Ryan (or 'John', as they were forced to settle with) and seeing him the way he was only broke his heart.

The once cunning, intelligent, and lively mercenary was gone. Replaced by a dull-eyed ,placid, man-child. The person who could steal a car, take down an entire squad of cops within minutes, and figure out the perfect logistic of knife-throwing... and now, he had to be helped while eating and someone had to help him wipe his chin, since he wouldn't even notice making a mess.

He knew deep down that Ryan would never have wanted this.

It didn't make his next move any easier.

Jeremy remembered one movie night where they decided to watch 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest'. It was some drama about Jack Nicholson causing havoc in a mental hospital and pissing off the head nurse. But in the end, he was forced to have electroshock therapy... and a lobotomy.

But remembering the ending was what spurred Jeremy into action.

It was his turn to help Ryan go to bed, so he escorted him into his room and swaddled him with blankets and cushions. Seeing Ryan smile would normally have made his heart flutter, but it just sank now.

"Goodnight, John." Jeremy said, forcing himself to sound cheerful.

"G'night Tim' Ryan chirped back. The affectionate nickname did garner a laugh, even if it was a quiet sad noise.

"...I love you."

"I love you too Tim."

Jeremy pressed a kiss against Ryan's forehead and watched Ryan's eyes slowly shut as he fell asleep.

Minutes ticked by before Jeremy moved.

He walked silently to the closet and pulled out an extra pillow. His hands were shaking, but he knew he couldn't back out now. He couldn't stop.

It had to be done.

Just as silently, Jeremy walked back to Ryan's bedside. The man was already fast asleep, looking so... peaceful and happy... he didn't have a clue of what was going to happen.

Jeremy grit his teeth, tears coming to his eyes.

He moved without thinking.

Jeremy tried to keep quiet as he pressed the pillow into Ryan's face with as much strength as he could muster. He held back a sob as Ryan had obviously awoken, as his hands flew up to grab hold of Jeremy's arms.

He had to do this... he had to...

Jeremy straddled Ryan's flailing body, putting more force into his actions and uncaring for the tears spilling down his face. "I'm sorry... I'm so sorry..."

Ryan's struggles soon began to weaken and slow down, hands gripping loosely at the Lad's forearms.

"I'm sorry Ryan... I love you... I love you..."

Jeremy couldn't stop sobbing as Ryan's body finally fell limp, but he kept the pillow in place. "I love you..."

Soon enough, Jeremy threw the pillow aside and keened mournfully as he looked at Ryan's pale face, his face peaceful. The Lad rolled off of Ryan's body and laid down next to him, burying his face into the shoulder of his love.


End file.
